[The free post this week tells the full story of how I killed an air plant and what it taught me about the narratives that hold senior professionals back. If you haven’t read it yet, start there — it sets up everything below.]
The Framework: How to Identify and Dismantle a Limiting Narrative
When I work with clients who feel stuck — passed over, invisible, undervalued — the first thing I look for isn’t a skills gap. It’s a story.
Not the kind you tell other people. The kind you tell yourself so quietly you don’t even realize it’s running.
These narratives operate like invisible ceilings. You don’t hit them in dramatic moments. You just… stop reaching. You don’t raise your hand. You don’t apply. You don’t push back. You don’t share the insight. And over time, the narrative becomes self-fulfilling — not because it was ever true, but because you behaved as though it was.
Here’s the framework I use with my clients to surface these narratives, test them, and build new ones. It’s the same process I went through with the plant — just applied to what actually matters.
Step 1: Name the Story
You can’t change a narrative you haven’t identified. And most of us are carrying stories so old we’ve forgotten they’re stories at all.
Write it down. Get specific.
“I’m bad at networking” is different from “I’m an introvert” which is different from “People don’t remember me after conversations.”
The more specific you are, the easier it becomes to challenge. Vague narratives feel like identity. Specific ones feel like claims — and claims can be tested.
Try this: Complete the sentence “I’m just not the kind of person who ___________.” Whatever comes after that? That’s your narrative.
